What do we expect out of Valentine’s?

Once during school, a boy I liked a lot gave me a handmade Valentine’s card. My reaction? I was absolutely devastated. Let me explain. There on the elegantly shaped pink construction-paper heart, neatly printed in perfectly spaced handwriting, was a beautiful verse about love. Sounds good, but wait. It was a scripture verse about God’s love– not romantic verse about the boy’s devotion to me.

In my youthful way of reading between the lines with absolute confidence in my own conclusions, I decided to my horror that such a card could only mean one thing. Clearly this boy wanted me to know that he only likes me as a friend, does not return my fragile affections, and is letting me down gently by reminding me that at least God still loves me (God, not him).

I tried not to let my disappointment show. Heartbroken, I thanked him for the card and quietly, dutifully forced myself to stop paying attention to him– in painful compliance with his plainly-expressed wishes, or so I believed.

In retrospect, I may have taken that wrong. Probably I blew it with a really nice guy who risked a handmade card only to find me inexplicably ignoring him afterwards and we both drew our own conclusions. Not exactly a storybook ending.

I’ve grown up a bit since then, but I’m still aware that we attach a lot of expectations to Valentine’s Day. If things don’t turn out like we imagined, all that pink and red can give us a severe case of the blues.

What we want

What do people want out of Valentine’s Day? Well, diamonds and cell phones if you believe the ads, and of course gifts are nice. Underneath all that we want to be appreciated, to be loved. Valentine’s gives us occasion to let people know that they are loved and appreciated. That is a good thing.

A couple of years ago, Rebecca Ryskind Teti asked women readers of her blog (www.faithandfamilylive.com) about their hopes for Valentine’s Day. She said that most of them mentioned Read more